


To Save A Life

by ForTheLoveOfLarry



Series: Larry's Love Lyrics [1]
Category: Larry Stylinson - Fandom, One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Depression, Elounor, Engagement, M/M, Song - Freeform, buckets of tears, surprise
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-05
Updated: 2013-06-05
Packaged: 2017-12-14 00:16:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,560
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/830493
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ForTheLoveOfLarry/pseuds/ForTheLoveOfLarry
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based off of the song "How To Save A Life" by The Fray. Listen to the songs lyrics because they narrate the story to a degree.</p><p>Louis has a surprise. Everyone is ecstatic about his good news but something seems off. Harry hasn't been himself lately and Lou hopes that the news will bring him some happiness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Save A Life

 

Today is the day I'm going to tell the guys. It had been a little over a year in the making but my plans have all fallen into place. My reservations are scheduled and the ring ordered. I can just see her face. The twinkle in her eyes as she sees the ring slide on to her finger.

 

The boys will be ecstatic. They know how much I love El, and I think I'm finally ready to take that next step.

 

Or thats what I thought.

 

• • • • •

 

I told them when we all were together. For the most part. Harry was out and about doing some shopping. But I could tell him later. It eating me from the inside out.

 

They were pretty excited for me. The odd thing was, Niall seemed a bit off.

 

"Whats the matter Niall?" I ask, as Zayn and Liam chat happily amongst themselves.

 

Niall looks worried, almost sad. "Are ya sure you're ready Lou? This is a huge commitment."

 

I just look at him. What does Niall mean by "am I ready"?

 

"I'm sure Niall. Don't you trust me?"

 

Niall sways on the balls of his feet and shrugs . His mind seems somewhere else though.

 

"I guess. When are ya gonna tell _Harry_?"

 

I had planned on going over to his flat tonight. Since he was out and about I didn't want to burden him with going home and coming over to mine. Maybe the news will cheer him up. You see, he's been slightly off lately.

 

I haven't seen him as much and he seems tired whenever I do. Somethings up, and I know it. But whenever I ask he just shrugs it off and blames television or his iPhone. Don't for one second think that I believe his bullshit.

 

Maybe I'll ask again tonight.

 

"Tonight. I was planning on going over to his flat."

 

Niall nods and goes to pour himself some Scotch. For the rest of the evening he seems mellow. Somber even.

 

• • • • •

 

"Hazza! Its Louis!" I pound on the door. Its a little past eight and I don't think he's gone to bed yet. Any later and I would definitely leave him be.

 

After a minute of knocking, the door slowly opens and I'm greeted with a very neutral looking Harry. He seems neither happy or sad, or any emotion really. Its a surreal look.

 

"I have some exciting news." I chirp as we step into his flat. Harry's living quarters are unusually quiet. All I can hear is the distant sound of Central London traffic.

 

Harry forces a smile and sits down with me in the couch.

 

"What is it, Lou?" He asks, enunciating each word. I happily clasp my hands together and take a deep breath in.

 

"I'm going to propose to Eleanor!"

 

The whole room's atmosphere changes. Harry lets out a small breath and his chest deflates as well as his Will. I wouldn't know the latter part until later on in the night.

 

"Thats great Boo. But I do think you should head home now. Its late."

 

That hurt. First Niall, and now Harry. My initial excitement diminished and now I am angry.

 

"I thought you would be happy." I seethe.

 

Harry just looks at me, empty eyed.

 

"For fucks sake, you need happiness. I'm not going to be arrogant and self centered and be mad at the fact that you're not happy for me. Oh no. You're never happy. You never sleep. I try to help you but you just wont tell me. What is it Harry? Why wont you tell me?!"

 

I just let it all spill out of my mouth. The anger laced in my words tastes like bleach, bitter and nasty. But I just want to help him. All I want is him to be okay.

 

Harry slowly stands up. His eyes are shimmering with tears. I didn't do that. Oh god, no.

 

"You know-" He manages before hiccuping. "Its your fault. Your goddamn fault. Its your fault that I sit at home, not sleeping or wanting to be me. Its hers too."

 

What the hell did Eleanor do?! How dare Harry blame her for anything. She's so kind and whole hearted. I'm just done. So done. An uncalled for feeling of rage builds up inside me. I stand up and look him in the eyes. Harry turns away and a tear streaks his cheek.

 

"All I want is to help you. You're not my Hazza anymore." I say, voice trembling and on the verge of a whisper. "Whatever god forsaken thing I did, I'm sorry."

 

Harry looks back at me. His eyes are tainted red and my heart aches. I cant stand to see him like this. It affects me even more than El's tears.

 

"You can't change yourself. It is what it is. Just go." Harry mumbles between sniffles. I look up at him, confused. Change myself?

 

I slowly walk to the door to show myself out. Before I shut it I glance back. Harry is just standing in the middle of the living room. His chest rises and falls sporadically as sobs erupt from inside him.

 

• • • • •

 

A good three hours later I am looking at Harry's door once again. I was lying in bed when the sudden feeling to go back came over me. I couldn't just leave him like that. We needed to do some proper talking and figure everything out. I owe it to him, at the least. Quickly, I threw on some clothes and made my way back downtown.

 

Looking under the door I can still see some light.

 

Thats strange.

 

I knock on the door a few times and theres no answer. My hand graces the doorknob and I turn it, just for kicks. Much to my surprise it opens.

 

Harry's flat looks the same as it did nearly three hours earlier. The living room light is on but I hear a strange noise come from the bathroom. A raspy breath intake. My eyes go wide.

 

"Harry?" I call as I walk toward the bathroom. In reply I hear a soft "No..." come from inside. My stomach ties in fifty knots as I step into the doorway.

 

Harry is lying on the floor, back pressed to the sink. He's dressed in his favorite jeans, tee-shirt, and boots. This obviously wasn't spur of the moment.

 

My stomach ties one final knot as I notice his sweat drenched curls clinging to his face, and a container grasped in his right hand.

 

"Fuck fuck fuck Haz." I gasp as I kneel to the floor and grasp the bottle. Its empty. Three hours ago it was full of 50mg pills. Now all thats left is an empty bottle.

 

Harry looks at me, tear stained cheeks.

 

"You came back." He rasps.

 

I just look at him and nod. I set the empty bottle down and whip out my mobile phone. Quickly, I place an ambulance call. Harry simply looks at me, breathing hard.

 

"They're not going to be able to do anything." He states.

 

Like Hell they wont.

 

"Why Harry? We love you. You know that. I love you." I mumble as I take Harry's damp head into my lap. His chest rises and falls in heaves and my heart breaks. I need to sort this out now. I need to tell him before this happens again.

 

"Thats all I wanted Lou." Harry breaths in rasps. "I loved you. El loves you. You had to choose."

 

My eyes widen in realization. Harry loves me. I tore him to pieces by being with Eleanor.

 

"Why didn't you tell me?" I plead, tears swelling up in my eyes.

 

"I don't want pity. You chose her with your heart. It wouldn't have worked out anyways. I was 'constantly playing, a game that I'm destined to lose'."

 

I chuckled through my tears at his clever use of our song lyrics. Harry cracked a faint smile. I slowly put my lips to his forehead and I could hear and see his breath hitch.

 

Harry just looked up at me with a sadness in his eyes. Sadness soon turned to panic.

 

"I'm scared." He whimpered.

 

"You will be okay. We will be okay." I sooth as I brush his damp curls out of his face. Ever so tenderly, my lips meet his. Through the connection I can feel his body shaking. I run my hand up and down his sweat streaked arm and Harry halts.

 

It was perfect. The way our lips met one another and seemed to melt together. His lips are different than El's. They're rough but have a comforting feeling. I feel Harry's eyelashes flutter against my face. Not until I felt a sharp breath from him into me did I pull away.

 

Harry just lays there, still. He was motionless in my lap. I only go on now with the knowledge that his last moments were spent on something he had long awaited. Too long.

 

A scream erupts from deep inside me and when I stop, the flat is silent. No more sobs, or strained breaths. No more slow silky words or devastated pleas. Ironically though, I can hear the distant sirens.

 

It wasn't until he was gone that I realized that he was what I wanted. I wanted curls. I wanted dimples. I wanted cheeky grins and contagious laughter.

 

I wanted Harry.

 

 

 

 


End file.
